The Kenyan Keralite

Today it’s not just parents complaining about their children spending too much time on the Internet. I also find myself complaining, over myself! While I consciously try ‘internet-insulating’ myself, here are a few warning signs I’ve come to realize. See if you can relate, add more if you’ve better ones. PS: Some characters or incidents mentioned are inspired by real individuals or happenings; so blame not, stop not your pointing fingers

• Your friend forgets his bank account’s online log-in credentials and many times unknowingly keys in Facebook/Twitter credentials on just about any log-in screen
• He knows what his latest online friend and/or his pet had for dinner last night but doesn’t know that his next-door neighbour’s not been there at home for over a week
• He takes his own sweet time to reply to your mail but you get his mails/messages/tweets asking you to ‘like’ his blog page, join ‘x’ group, see his latest blog post etc.
• He tweets more frequently than he’d CTRL+C or Google search
• He is ‘now friends with’ some individual from the other side of the globe whose name is awfully similar to a new virus you read about yesterday (ok, maybe now your friend might learn, but no, you then see his tweet “thanks @virus-name for being my 1000th friend”!)
• He resorts to Facebook/Twitter to ask ‘friends’ out for a movie rather than simply call/walk up to and ask. Worse still it’s done over a public announcement: “I’m going for a movie, which one of you can I pull in”
• He wouldn’t be there for your gang’s lunch-out but you’d find many of his tweets saying “had a great time at yesterday’s tweet-up”
• Your soft-spoken, polite friend is suddenly using F and A words in status updates
• You know it’s crossing dangerous levels when your friend’s mom, whom you’ve never met, is requesting friendship in Facebook but she’s not Facebook friends with her child, your friend! (Mom’s probably investigating child’s online escapades)
• I like this last one because I see it everywhere: your friend’s suddenly a Subject Matter Expert sharing a dozen links a day on some complex topic. All without giving credits to the news source. And the best part, sharing links even without reading them
• Number eleven for my wifey Your husband’s knowing and writing ‘Subject Matter Experting’ points above while you’re working it out in the kitchen getting no help at all

Let’s meet more often offline.

It felt so great the last time I met my school friends. We chat and Facebook whenever we can but nothing beats the energy and excitement of a physical meeting. Put in a few drinks and fried chicken and you are set, not to ever look at your watch but instead be reminded that you are needed somewhere else by some suddenly very intruding (hey that’s your mom!) phone call. Tweet-ups are cool but let’s just first meet-up old friends please.

Take care.